Real Talk 101

I LOVE IT! There are so many quoteable moments in this lil video. The laughs are a plenty. But for real, who plays these games?

former flames...current ashes

it humors me, really it does. oh yeah, i am talking about ex-boyfriends trying to bring that old thing back...LAME! once i am done, i am done. now, i am cordial, i will even hang out with an ex but I AM NOT sleeping with you again, sorry sir. what kills me is when they want to talk about the good times we had, yeah HAD, meaning in the past.

maybe i shouldn't hang out with any of them, perhaps that gives them illusions of grandeur and hope for things to cum ;). maybe its the fact that my breakups are usually a peaceful dissolution, never a loud "fuck you, i can't stand you" experience. besides, i am always friends with anyone i have been in a relationship with and i have the ability to see that ex-man as just a friend after a breakup. now how they see me may be totally different and is beyond my control but i know what the limits are and don't cross them.

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what do i want? this is a question i ask myself often. there are two areas this applies to, life and love. and yes, i want them both. thankfully, i know what its like to experience them both so if i left now i would really be cool, honestly!

so i am approaching 30 and its time for me to get serious. i always make interesting choices in relationships. i don't regret any of them because really each one has taught me something but i am not going back to any of them. so from my past experiences come my present conclusions. i want a MAN. this is not determined by age, but by actions. i'm not gonna get into my definition of a man, but know that i was raised by my dad so i know wassup!

when it comes to children, i definitely want some. but on top of being a mother, i want to be a parent. i am all about raising children. that means my natural children or those through marriage or even adoption. if i do not have children by 35 then its a wrap. i have never been pregnant so when it does happen, it's no way i would terminate. too late in the game for that option, plus at this point its not an "oops" situation.

so this dating thing is so funny. its something i am having to reacquaint myself with. i am certain i am doing some parts of this wrong, but i am enjoying it. i figure if it feels good, do it, with moderation, LOL. i'm not gonna get into the details of my present company, but know that i'm cool ;)

♥

so i have had a few conversations with some friends over the past few days and it seems that some of them have parted ways with their lovers because of less than stellar Valentine pony shows i.e. their guy didn't spend enough, how dreadful. now don't get me wrong, i don't hate valentine's day, its cool. i just feel that it is completely overrated + i am more concerned about what is done on the other 364 days.

so back to the situation at hand: i mean seriously, you're telling me that you have just cut him off because he didn't buy you enough stuff? I would understand if ya'll have been together for a while and he didn't show any appreciation. but, ya'll only been seeing each other for like 3-4 months. besides, its a recession! well at least that's the reason people are using for most things these days ;) me personally, i don't celebrate any of those lil "holidays" until i've been with a man for a minute, i takes my time. gift giving for me is personal and should be memorable. if i am gonna give, i need to know (1) you appreciate me first (2) what your likes and dislikes are (3) what really makes you smile and brings you joy. it's not about the monetary value, the sentiment lasts so much longer. nothing is better than giving someone a gift that they truly like, love, enjoy. they will never forget who gave it to em.